The Frozen Saga: An Introduction

You may know of a 2013 animated film about two sisters who live in an always-snowy fictional realm. One of them leaves because she has the same powers overall as Iceman from X-Men, and subsequently turns what was a cute little film with terrible marketing aimed at the typical 5-10 year-old female demographic into a worldwide phenomenon, sparking a rising franchise. For copyright reasons we’ll call the movie “Icebox” and the multi billion-dollar studio that made it “MouseEars”.

And you probably know Icebox made over a billion dollars at the box office and everybody loved it across the world. Everyone, that is, except me.

Or at least that’s what I thought for the following years after Icebox‘s release. More recently I discovered that a lot of people don’t like Icebox, many of them around my age! I was delighted to discover there’s a group of people who hate this film just as much as I do.

“Ok, so why do you hate it?” someone may ask. Good question. Sometimes I’ve found that people, especially those on the Internet, hate a movie but can’t back up any of their claims. Not the case with Icebox. It contains plenty of problems, problems that a lot of people need to know about, whether they like or dislike the movie. My biggest problem is its plot, which I think a lot of people forgot about during the whole 2013 craze. As I’ll explain, the plot has numerous holes and contains a lack of explanation and decent villains, among other issues.

That’s what this “Saga” is, a look at the movie itself, its subsequent turn into a massive franchise, reviews of elements of said franchise, and, most importantly why Icebox‘s plot is so, so poor. No, ‘poor’ isn’t the right word, how about ‘horrid’.

You won’t see an “episode 1” here, which would’ve been my review of the film, so I’ll summarize. The plot made little sense, the songs were annoying beyond belief, I didn’t care about the characters, there were too many rehashed story elements from other, better animated movies, etc, etc. Overall, I thought the movie was overhyped for what it was.

And to properly explain the rest of my feelings about the movie, I direct you to the original lyrics below:

Oh I want to melt a snowman,

With a flamethrower or torch,

Because this move’s overhyped, 

With terrible plot lines,

And a laughable moral…

It’s really just a soundtrack,

With a sort-of story,

That should’ve undergone more rewrites…

Oh I want to melt a snowman,

So that’s what I’m going to do,

By writing this whole saga down! 

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